Friday, December 26, 2008

What It’s Like Living in Montana

Well, I ran out of steam this year coming up with all original material (must be the sleep depravation), so I’ve modified some of Jeff Foxworthy’s comments on Montana.

  • “Vacation” to me means going shopping for the weekend in Great Falls or Kalispell.
  • Parking our car for the night involves an extension cord.
  • Joe considers it a sport to gather our food by drilling through 8 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by.
  • Our state makes the national news primarily because it houses the coldest spot in the nation (where Joe and I tied the knot last November at the courthouse!).
  • I’m starting to refuse to buy things because they’re “too Spendy.”
  • All our local hotels and restaurants are closed October through May.
  • I’ve seen Joe wear shorts and a parka at the same time.
  • I now know how to correctly pronounce Butte, Havre, Valier, Dupuyer and Choteau.
  • We measure distance in hours.
  • Joe can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching. I don’t flinch any more, but I do hang on.
  • It’s common to see people wearing hunting clothes or rodeo clothes at social events.
  • The largest traffic jam in Browning centres around a high school basketball game.
  • There are more people at work on Christmas Eve Day than on Opening Deer Rifle Season.
  • We plan William’s Halloween costume to fit over a Snowsuit.
  • My favourite: driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
  • There are two season in East Glacier Park: winter and relatives. (Thanks for this one, Beth!)
  • A brat is something we eat. (And what’s with “red weenies” and “fry bread”?)
  • I’m starting to find 0 degrees Farenheit “warming up.”
My nieces and nephew finally get a cousin. William has seven fabulous cousins on Joe’s side.

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